Each week we change the words/quote/saying that we are displaying on the noticeboard in our kitchen; these are the words we try to live by individually and as a family that week. Some weeks may focus on lifting our mood, others may be about motivation or attitude to life; something that speaks to us on some level and that we can directly apply to our lives. Changing the words each week stops them from becoming just another thing you walk past without really seeing, it keeps things fresh and stops them losing their power. This series is where I share those words with you in the hope they may help you and your family too.
Without further ado, this weeks words are:
Thanks to today’s media and our seemingly endless need for gossip we are all being bombarded on a daily basis with people being judged. Everyone is always judged on their appearance; they are too fat, too thin, too old, too young, too ugly, too pretty. We criticise people for the way they dress, the way they live their lives, the way they raise their kids, the amount of money they have or don’t have. And instead of being horrified but this constant judgement, it has become the norm.
Don’t get me wrong, I am no saint and am just as guilty as everyone else for engaging in this baseless judgement of others. The majority of the time it is aimed at celebrities, people we don’t know (no matter how much it may feel like we do), people we will likely never meet. Because of that distance it seems ok. But how would you feel if that was your child, a parent, a sibling, a best friend. Would you consider all those judgements ok then?
We have no idea what that person is going through, what pain they have suffered, whether they cry themselves to sleep at night.
There really is no way we can know the heart, the intentions, or the circumstances of someone who might say or do something we find reason to criticize. Thus, judge not.” – Thomas S. Monson
Putting others down to make themselves feel better used to be the reserve of the school bullies but now it seems we are all at it. Since becoming a parent it really does worry me what kind of society we are bringing them into, the judgements they will face growing up.
“When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.” – Dr. Wayne Dyer
I find myself doing it all the time; I see someone on the tv or walking past me in the street and I make a snap judgement about them without ever having spoken to them. What does that say about me? Not something I like that’s for sure. Once you start paying attention to your thought processes you will be amazed at just how many times a day you judge other people for no good reason.
I was raised, as I’m sure many of you were, with the old saying “If you have nothing nice to say, then don’t say anything at all”. But somewhere along the line this seems to have been forgotten.
Just because I never voice these judgements to the persons face does that make it ok?
Last weeks words were all about being kind to one another with our words and actions, this week I want to take things a step further and show kindness in our thoughts toward others too. No-one will know you have made a change but you will feel it in yourself.
As with last week, we need to remember not to leave ourselves out of the equation too. If anything we are probably far more judgmental towards ourselves than anyone else ever will be.
If I stop judging other people, I free myself from being judged, and I can dance.” – Patti Digh
So this week is all about paying attention to our thoughts, when we hear ourselves passing judgement, whether against others or ourselves, we need to interrupt the thought and try to think of something positive to replace it.
I’ll leave you with one final quote:
“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” – Mother Teresa